Unleash the Power of Listening
by: Barbara White
A vital skill in becoming an effective communicator is the ability to listen. Listening skills are not taught in school, and sadly are largely undeveloped skill in many people. To listen effectively is a powerful skill that can be learnt and practiced. You will gain more respect and esteem through listening rather than through talking
It?s funny how sometimes you associate a certain phrase with someone. I knew someone called Ray and what I remember about him the most was when he was listening to someone talk he would keep saying ?I hear you? I would wonder whether he was saying that because he heard, but disagreed with what the person was saying, or if it was a noncommittal filler
There is however a great difference between hearing and listening. Hearing refers to the physical dimension of the sound waves striking the ear and the brain processing them into meaningful information. Listening, however, involves far more than the hearing process. It incorporates paying attention and focusing with the intention of understanding and responding appropriately.
The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and to be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them. Not only that but when people feel that you have really listened to them, you will gain their respect and they will value and give you the credibility to speak.
Consider how you feel when you sense someone is really listening to what you have to say.
You feel good, you feel understood, and more connected to the person who is listening. The fact that they are interested causes you to feel cared for.
One important element of listening is the ability to attend.
Attending is the process where we focus in on a message and filter out others that are distracting. It is to be able to focus on what the person is saying, and filter out all the other things that may be happening at the same time.
Someone once said (his name was anonymous) that the reason history repeats itself is because no one was listening the first time. When I first heard that, I realized history always repeating in my house especially around bedtime! That is the time when my kids practice attending. They focus on what they are doing (and it?s not homework) and filter me out as a distraction each time I remind them that it?s bedtime!
One of the biggest distractions to attending is our desire to talk
The desire to talk is so strong that while the other person is talking we can be thinking about what we are going to say next, and waiting for an opportunity to speak. As we focus on what we are going to say or interject, our attention goes from what the person is saying to our own thoughts. Although appearing to be interested and attentive, we can easily be distracted by our thoughts or something else that may be happening at the same time. At that point perhaps we do fall into merely hearing and not listening. Our mind?s attention has drifted onto other things and is no longer intent on understanding and responding.
True listening is a skill which needs to be learnt and practiced because the mind functions seven times more quickly than it is possible to speak. Therefore the mind needs to be slowed down and focused on what the person is saying, and not pay attention to other irrelevant thoughts or distractions.
One of my all time favourite books is ?The Success Principles? written by Jack Canfield.
One of the Principles he writes about in the book is how to use the power of listening as a way of building rapport and connecting with people. Jack created a series of four questions that he uses in personal and business situations. He asks the questions one after another. The first time he tried it was with his sister Kim. He asked the first question and listened to her response. When she had finished he asked the next question, and continued in this manner through all the questions.
Afterwards Kim smiled said to him ?That?s the best conversation I think we?ve ever had. I feel so clear and focused. I know exactly what I need to go and do now.
Thank you? He was amazed as he hadn?t said a word except to ask the four questions, and had resisted the inclination to jump in with his own responses. He has found this works everytime and uses the questions frequently.
I have used this strategy, but by using my own questions and have been amazed at the results. Not only have the questions given me a greater understanding of the person, but through the fact of actively listening to people without commenting or putting my 2 cents worth in they have experienced encouragement and a sense of connectedness. I now make sure that I ask questions and listen more than I speak.
I want you to take a moment now to think of a question that you could use to practice actively listening, and resist the impulse to speak. When you have the opportunity, use your question or questions and experience the power of building rapport with others through the power of listening.
About The Author
Barbara White? trains individuals and organizations to become powerful and effective communicators. Learn more by visiting http://www.livingbeyondbetter.com. For more self improvement articles: http://www.articlesbeyondbetter.com. barbara@livingbeyondbetter.com
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What To Expect If You Are Charged With A Crime
What To Expect If You Are Charged With A Crime
by: Jody Ehrhardt
Although most people never expect to be charged with a crime, there can come a time when that can happen. These types of charges can range form warrants being issued for aid traffic tickets to individuals filing lawsuits against you. The best time to prepare for being charged with a crime is before it ever happens.
Since lawsuits and arrests can move quickly, it is best to understand the basic events that lead up to and constitute being charged with a crime prior to the being charged. If you are knowledgeable about the events beforehand, the process can go easier and hopefully, be less intimidating.
No matter which type of crime you are charged with, the proceedings will usually happen in a predetermined way. First, a warrant will put for your arrest. If a warrant is issued against you, you will usually be notified of the warrant by being served. Being served means that a...
What To Expect If You Are Charged With A Crime
Hearing aids > What To Expect If You Are Charged With A Crime
Massage Los Angeles
Massage Los Angeles
by: Caroline Colby
Massage therapy has been used in many cultures for thousands of years. Massage is the systemized manipulation of soft tissues to relieve pain, instill a feeling of well being and normalize tissue position. Los Angeles, always a hotbed of exciting ideas, has been an area with a thriving massage therapy industry for years.
Searching the Los Angeles yellow pages under for massage therapists can yield an interesting selection of businesses. Chiropractors, often the most conventional massage providers, abound in the metropolitan area. Many provide traditional chiropractic manipulation and massage therapies in combined treatment plans.
Prenatal and baby massage is becoming more and more popular and chic in the Los Angeles area. Prenatal massage therapy relieves the discomfort and stress that a pregnancy can cause. Celebrity moms-to-be are fueling the trend, but the positive benefits of this type of massage...
Massage Los Angeles
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7 Keys to Turning Cold Calls Into Warm Calls
7 Keys to Turning Cold Calls Into Warm Calls
by: Ari Galper
Let?s face it when it comes to cold calling many of us fear being rejected.
What if I was to tell you I have come up with 7 keys to turning your cold calls into warm calls?
Would you believe me?
Try these 7 cold calling ideas for yourself and see just how easy making a cold call
can really be.
1.
Change Your Mental Objective Before You Make Your Call
When making a cold call the traditional way, your main objective is usually to try and get the appointment or make the sale. The main problem with that is when you do make the call it is quite clear to the person on the other end of the phone that this is your goal and they usually think of an excuse to get you off the phone before they have a chance to hear what you have to say.
To turn your cold calls into warm calls you need to change your objective to creating a feeling of trust...
7 Keys to Turning Cold Calls Into Warm Calls
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hCG - Human Chorionic Gonada-what?
hCG - Human Chorionic Gonada-what?
by: Susan Tanner
...Tropin. Human chorionic gonadotropin. Sound
Familiar? You may or may not have heard of hCG,
but if you have, it may be because you read it on the
box of your home pregnancy test. That's because
hCG is the basis of home pregnancy tests. It's also
the basis for the blood and urine pregnancy tests that
your doctor performs. But there is much more to hCG
than simply being an indicator of pregnancy.
HCG is a hormone produced by the placenta during
pregnancy. It begins being produced and released
into the blood almost immediately after the egg
attaches to the uterine wall. Since hCG is released
into the blood so soon after conception, it can be
detected there even before your first missed
menstrual period, as early as six days after
implantation. Its function is to prevent the disintegration of
the corpus luteum of the ovary and thereby...
hCG - Human Chorionic Gonada-what?
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Unleash the Power of Listening Hearing aids
Unleash the Power of Listening
Finding A Company To Consolidate Debt
Finding A Company To Consolidate Debt
by: Carrie Reeder
A debt management company can consolidate your debt and lower your interest rates by negotiating with your creditors. Debt management companies can also help you pay off your loans sooner. But before you sign up with a company, make sure your research their services, fees, and practices.
Research Companies
It is important to research debt management companies to make sure you aren?t scammed out...
Finding A Company To Consolidate Debt
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